I am glad it is not porn (Support Forum Post)

Last Updated on Friday, 25 March 2011 12:06 Written by Wes Tuesday, 15 March 2011 01:19

The following post was recently written by a support forum member, and just goes to show we will always face new challenges…

Optimist on Sun Mar 06, 2011 1:46 pm

I haven’t been here in a while. I have been porn free for probably a little more than two years. I used to come here when i was particularly stressed about porn. Well, the issue right now is not porn but I am particularly stressed.

I have been dating my girlfriend for almost six months. Thursday night, we came awfully close to having sex. My religion, scratch that… OUR religion prohibits sex before marriage. We both love each other but are both finding it rather difficult to keep ourselves far from that line. We are both feeling like we either need to get married or break up.

She is not ready to get married. So that leaves us with one option. Now I am feeling the massiveness of this oppressive mountain in front of me. She is literally three inches from breaking up with me. I love her but I won’t blame her for breaking up. I know that I haven’t been easy on her.

So I feel kind of dead. I know that I have beat the tough times before. But it feels like it is time to shut off the water main inside of me, turn off the electricity, pour antifreeze in the toilets before I checkout for the season. She was the only thing pushing me forward. Now i feel that I must exist from day to day only to reach the other side of this vast chasm of empty, emotionless void. Where did all the happiness go?

Funny! I know that this is going to be tough. But I’m glad that it is not porn. I feel emotionally dead but there is nothing that deadens me faster and deeper than the destructiveness of porn. How glorious it is to be rid of that parasite that feeds upon all the parts of my life that I cherish most. I think we tend to forget things very easily with the passing of time. I am pleased that I still recollect after two years that I would rather deal with my current trials than trying desperately to climb from the toxic waste well of porn.


1 Comment

  1. Ward Sacco   |  Wednesday, 13 April 2011 at 5:59 am

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